-By A Special Correspondent
(Lanka-e-News -02.April.2025, 11.10 PM) In what could be the most dramatic political march since Gandhi's Dandi Salt March—minus the salt but with plenty of spice—Tamil Nadu Chief Minister MK Stalin is gearing up to retrieve Katchatheevu Island. And how, you ask? With his trusty walking sticks leading the charge! That’s right—when diplomacy stumbles, Tamil Nadu’s leader is ready to walk the talk… literally.
As tensions rise between Tamil Nadu’s fishermen and the Sri Lankan Navy, Stalin has taken it upon himself to reclaim the 285-acre island, which was handed over to Sri Lanka in 1974 in what historians describe as “one of history’s most generous giveaways.”
While critics argue that revisiting a 50-year-old agreement is like reopening a WhatsApp group from 2016 (full of unread messages and long-forgotten emojis), Stalin is adamant: Tamil Nadu’s fishermen must get justice. And if it takes a resolution, a few speeches, and some aggressive walking, so be it!
Eyewitnesses claim that Stalin has been seen practicing his march, walking sticks in hand, much like Moses preparing to part the Red Sea—except, in this case, the sea is already divided, and the fishermen are just trying to cross it without getting arrested.
According to inside sources (mostly an overenthusiastic tea vendor outside the Assembly), the Chief Minister has a detailed plan:
Phase One: Table the resolution in the Assembly, which, in true Tamil Nadu political fashion, will be met with enthusiastic thumping, dramatic table-slamming, and at least three MLAs pretending to faint for effect.
Phase Two: Politely demand that Prime Minister Narendra Modi take the issue up with Sri Lanka, while subtly reminding everyone that Tamil Nadu is a proud state with a long memory.
Phase Three: If all else fails, personally lead a walking expedition to Katchatheevu, much like a modern-day freedom march, except this one involves GPS tracking, live tweeting, and the occasional samosa break.
The resolution urges Prime Minister Modi to have a “friendly chat” with Sri Lankan leaders and ask them—nicely—to hand the island back. Of course, anyone familiar with international diplomacy knows that retrieving land from another country is slightly more complicated than borrowing sugar from a neighbor. But Tamil Nadu insists: if it was given away, it can be taken back.
Meanwhile, some political analysts fear that Sri Lanka’s response will be a polite but firm, “Who gave it to you in the first place? Take it up with them.” (A historically accurate but highly inconvenient argument for Tamil Nadu.)
The plight of Tamil Nadu’s fishermen is no laughing matter. Every few months, news emerges of fishermen being arrested by the Sri Lankan Navy, their boats confiscated, and their livelihood threatened.
Fishermen from Rameswaram and nearby areas have resorted to strikes and protests, and in one particularly emotional moment, a group of senior fishermen declared, “We have been arrested so many times, we might as well apply for Sri Lankan citizenship!” (No word yet on whether they’ve received application forms.)
Rajya Sabha MP Vaiko even called the Indian Navy a “lame duck” for its failure to intervene. To be fair, the Navy has to deal with far bigger maritime threats, and when comparing rogue submarines with enthusiastic but hungry fishermen, priorities tend to shift.
While Stalin’s move is bold, many wonder whether retrieving Katchatheevu is feasible or just a great way to keep politicians busy until the next election. If history has taught us anything, it's that territorial disputes make excellent election slogans but very tricky foreign policies.
That said, Tamil Nadu remains determined, and if all else fails, Stalin’s walking sticks will be ready for an expedition. Because if you can’t negotiate your way to Katchatheevu, you might as well walk there!
Stay tuned. If nothing else, this saga promises to be a blockbuster—Tamil Nadu style.
-By A Special Correspondent
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by (2025-04-02 18:43:01)
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